Hip Hop’s 5 Worst Music Videos of 2014
What better way to tell you about 2014’s Worse Music Videos, but to make you watch them all over again.
1. PSY featuring Snoop Dogg, “Hangover”
For those surprised that this is the same happy YouTube star that brought joy to the world in 2012 with “Gangnam Style,” consider the cavalcade of celebrity PSY has enjoyed and endured since his breakthrough. Given the circumstances, it’s hardly surprising he’s sought kinship in the arms of veteran weed cultivator and rapper Snoop Dogg. Together, they’ve come up with an anthem about partying till you puke. Too bad the results are more head-scratching than amusing.
2. Riff Raff, “Dolce & Gabbana”
It’s pretty hard to take Texas boy Horst Christian Simco (aka Riff Raff) seriously. The guy looks about as street as Tobey Maguire, even with the python around his neck. And if, as he says, he “only f—s with hos who rock Dolce & Gabbana,” then we doubt he’s getting a lot of action — unless he’s paying to be playing. From his bling-and-braids fashion sense to the weak, sloppy rhyming, there’s very little to recommend about this clip. And if it was just intended to be a stoopid spoof of hip-hop indulgence, well, the joke’s lost on us.
3. Justin Bieber featuring Chance the Rapper, “Confident”
The only thing Bieber has in common with Justin Timberlake is the first name. The young, overly “confident” singer tries to come off all seductive, but he seems more like a stalker as he follows a young lady down an alley and through a bar. The mid-song acting segment is, at best, high-school-film-class quality. And how Bieber ends up wooing the object of his desire with weak pickup lines instead of getting sprayed with Mace is a mystery to us. Never mind the fact that his wardrobe choices of oversized sunglasses and giant gold necklace are as ridiculous as his barely visible mustache.
4. Jennifer Lopez featuring Iggy Azalea, “Booty”
Newsflash! Jennifer Lopez has a pretty fine booty. But in case you forgot, J.Lo is here to remind you, with some help from the equally bootylicious Iggy Azalea, who is 21 years her junior. What results is a sleazy montage of grinding, bumping, and sliding that falls just short of late-night Cinemax programming. Women may be queens of pop these days, which is all well and good, but the messages of objectification they continue to perpetuate is at best perplexing, and, in this case, appalling.
5. IceJJFish, “On the Floor”
Remember American Idol reject William Hung? Well, IceJJFish makes Hung sound like Adam Lambert. The big question is, does Ice Fish Man know he has terrible flow and a horrible singing voice? The semi-slick video for “On the Floor” suggests he doesn’t, though it further proves the guy dances as poorly as he sings. The entire production is so bad, it’s hard to feel anything but sympathy for someone so deluded. Only the truly cruel-hearted would consider this funny. Still, morbid curiosity knows no bounds, which explains how “On the Floor” has racked up more than 32 million views since it was posted in February.
AND A BONUS!!! but not really.
Nicki Minaj, “Anaconda”
Science and technology have come so far. High-quality albums can be recorded for a fraction of their former price, digital content can be transferred across the world in mere seconds, and phones and tablets now serve as portable laptops, cameras, and movie screens. And yet, for all the advances society has made, music videos are still a conduit for sexual promiscuity and misogyny, even among female artists. Nicki’s “Anaconda” references, and even samples, Sir Mix-a-Lot’s “Baby Got Back,” but it takes the premise of the derriere as an object of desire to new, um, lows. “Starship,” this is not.